Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Next time, we are sacraficing the cat
We do not have a basement, so finding a "safe" place means moving the corner shelf out of the powder room, grabbing pillows and blankets and corralling the family into that wee space.
The pillows and blankets are not for comfort. Nope. That is so we have tools to block one cat's view of the other. Otherwise holy hell will be unleashed in that 5 x 5 and nobody will come out alive. Or at least without claw marks and bloodied eye sockets.
So, there we sat...the three of us and two cats...listening to the wind howl and the rain pelt the windows, hoping that the storm would pass quickly.
It started to get stuffy. The scanner started to lose it's battery life and Joe had to hold it above his head and at odd angles to hear if a tornado was heading our way. Hobbes was howling. Emma was yelling at him to shut-up. And Grace clawed my knee caps to express her dismay at being held on my lap.
Yeah. It was a regular party in there.
Then we got the giggles.
Have you seen the show "Naked and Afraid?" It's on Discovery or Lifetime or one of those channels, and it features two naked survivalists in some wild, desolate location trying to survive for 3 weeks. We likened our time in that powder room to that show--except we weren't naked. And it wasn't for three weeks. Thank god.
Hobbes was the worst. Em said he was more "Hungry and Pissed" than "Naked and Afraid." His PSR (Primitive Survival Rating) lowered with each minute that passed. He was getting less and less cooperative, and a little more cranky. We were gonna kill him if we didn't laugh. Joe narrated as he tried to escape--swatting at Grace who was right behind him. And he summed up Hobbes' time in the powder room by wrapping it up like they do on the show: "Hobbes lost 1 pound during his adventure."
If the tornado didn't kill us, the time in the bathroom almost did.